Saturday, April 6, 2013

life is hard sometimes.

I am currently sitting at the kitchen table at my parents house in my 'home and native land'. (Canada) I got a message yesterday from my mother that instantly made my heart break and brought me to tears.

"just a quick note. We got a call from J. and he found Chris laying on the floor at the condo seizuring. They took him by ambulance to the hospital. I am just about to board a plane for Winnipeg and dad and buddy are driving down. I will keep in touch. Mom"

A little back story: my little brother is Chris. He is two years younger than me and he has Multiple Sclerosis and numerous other medical conditions. He is unable to work because of the severity of his ms. He is also unable to live on his own. With healthcare costing what it does in America and his in ability to take care if himself my parents decided it was best for him to move back in with them in Canada. This way he could receive free health care and they could help him out.
J. Is my brothers home care helper. Originally everyone thought that maybe with help he could re learn some basic tasks that you an I take for granted. Things like going to the store, remembering to brush your teeth, riding the bus. J. Comes and visits with my little brother twice a day. My parents happened to be back in the town I grew up in and we are all so very thankful for J. He had called my little brother to check on him and when he didn't answer he decided to swing over. He found my little brother seizing on the floor by the front door. No idea how Lon he had been there. He called an ambulance and they rushed him in. My mom caught the first flight home on a tiny little puddle jumper ( I grew up in Northern Manitoba) and then got to the hospital as soon as she could. My dad drove the 6 hours down to Winnipeg with the dog through icy crappy conditions. I got to Winnipeg this morning with my older brother.
As I sit here its been over 30 hours and my little brother still hasn't woken up. Doctors aren't sure exactly why he hasn't woken up. He looks like he is trying to open his eyes but he just can't seem to. He is in the intensive care unit at the Health Science Center. The same hospital we spent hours upon hours in when I was a child for his medical procedures he had back then. None of them were nearly a serious as this. Seeing your baby brother in a bed with tubes coming out from all over his body is heartbreaking. Seeing all those monitors they are hooked up to those tubes that are real and not something you see on tv is just a weird feeling I can't even explain. When going in to see him we had to dress in paper gowns, gloves, masks, and googles.
We talked to him and my mom held his hand. When we said certain things he would squeeze her hand. And when I said his favorite quote from Sid Vicious of the Sex Pistols he squeezed my moms hand tighter, opened his eye for a split second, and then raised his other hand, the way he did when you were telling a story and e wanted to add something to it. I wish the doctor would play some of his favorite music and see what would happen. I mean it couldn't hurt and they are trying everything else. He really is getting top notch care.
When my other brother and I were waiting outside his room we were dealing with the pain the best way we knew how. With humor. We talked about how if we saw just one person rolled in with a zombie bite on the neck we were out of there.

So that's all I have right now. I am exhausted. And know we have a long, long road ahead. So please keep us in your prayers if you are the praying type.


  1. You are all in my prayers and thoughts.

  2. Many prayers and good thoughts from here. Do keep the humor flowing - it will reach your brother!

  3. Sending positive healing thoughts and prayers your way!

  4. Praying for your brother, you and the whole family!

  5. So sorry! Sending positive thoughts your way!

  6. I am just getting caught up with my blog reading, and I am so sorry to read of your brother's health challenges. I know two people with MS. It's a horrible disease. I am sending positive thoughts your way.